Backtrack #13: Photo Shoots

For our dance recital at TumbleAmerica we decided that I'd take the pictures.  We purchased a studio lighting set up and I began experimenting.  It took a lot of work figuring out the perfect places for everything.  During the many many trials and errors, Amelia was my helper.  These are a few photos that I couldn't bring myself to delete.

She sleeps with this bear every day in her little room at TumbleAmerica.

Backtrack #12: Bass Lake

I love the outdoors.  Camping, lakes, mountains, fishing...they are all reminiscent of my childhood memories.  We were an outdoor family.  One thing I miss deeply from Utah is the outdoors, the scenery and the seasons.  I hadn't been to Bass Lake here in Fresno, so we decided to take Memorial Day off work and head up the road.  Jessi joined us for the drive.  I am SO happy we went.  It is a beautiful lake.  The weather was gorgeous.  The trees were stunning.  I definitely look forward to camping at Bass Lake this Summer.  When I was pregnant with Amelia, Jessi was the first person we told...so we decided to keep the tradition.  While eating lunch, we told her I was having another baby!  She was so good and kept it a secret for an entire week.  I was actually shocked that she was able to do it.   

Jessi and Amelia actually went swimming.  It was super cold.  Seemed crazy to me!

 

Backtrack #11: More of the same

More pictures of my little Mia.  More pictures that make tears well up.  Seriously!  How in the fa-reak is she already three years old?

Backtrack #10: This is what's perfect

I knew he would be a good Dad, even though he was hesitant to be one.  I knew that he would teach our children with guidance and thought.  I knew that he would make it a point to spend TIME with his children. I knew all of this before I even fell in love with him.  What I didn't know, is how perfect of a father he would be to our little girl.  I hope that in 23 years, she marries someone just like him.  Someone who will be a perfect Father for her children.  Promise me A?  Promise me you'll find someone just like him?

Backtrack #9: Clovis Rodeo Parade

SwimAmerica and TumbleAmerica took part in our local Rodeo Parade last year.  We made a "float" (pathetic and ill-willed attempt), had little ones from the gym and pool join us, and handed out fliers.  Amelia rode on the float with Coach Morgan and waved at everyone the entire time.  It was a fun experience, but I can't say we'll be taking on that adventure again.  It was simply exhausting.

Waiting for the parade to begin  

(Looking at this picture which was taken a year ago makes me realize how much she has changed this year.  This has definitely been a period of massive changes:: looks, size, language, knowledge, personality.  It truly makes me sick to my stomach to think of how quickly she will grow up.  I often wonder why we only get to enjoy the perfect innocence of childhood for such a short lived period of time?  Why is adulthood longer than childhood?  Why do the days and years go by quicker as I get older?  Perhaps it's because I don't "stop and smell the roses" anymore.  Perhaps I rush through each day, inundating myself with frivolous "to do" lists?  Whatever it is...I need to STOP.  I need to enjoy.  I need to lie on the grass with my baby girl. I need to walk with her...barefoot in rain puddles.  I need to remember how I feel when I sit and reflect, when I look at pictures past, when I remember that I am only given this time with my children for so few precious years.  How can I remember the feelings of this moment throughout my everyday life?  I'm determined to focus more so on creating memories, creating a life, creating love.) Phew!  Where'd that come from :/

Backtrack #8: Capturing it all

I wish I could capture feelings instead of words, instead of memories and photos.  The feelings I have when I look at my children are what I hope to never forget.  Unfortunately, I will.  Feelings from this age will be replaced with new feelings when she heads off to Kindergarten and again when she goes to her first High School dance, and yet again when she gets married (gasp!) and has her own babies.  The ability is "feel" seems like one of the best gifts I've been given.  Luckily, photos and words do help those feelings come back, if even only for a moment.  

Looking at this photo makes me remember how I cried this day.  My little girl is growing up, much faster than I'm okay with.  She will be heading off to school before I know it.  I can hardly stand that thought.  While I'm grateful to see her grow and learn, I struggle with knowing she will only be this age for such a short period of time. I hope I'm cherishing it enough.

Looking at this photo makes me remember how it felt to know that my little girl was confident enough to make her own choices, and feel happy about them.  Oh how I hope she always feels content with the choices she makes.  I hope she always shows her self confidence with a beautiful smile on her face.

Backtrack #7: Good friends, and so happy about it!

Really, I'm not sure how things lined up so perfectly.  I'm not sure why these women (am I really old enough to call my friends women instead of girls?....women seems more respectful, and that's what they deserve) are so good to me.  All I really know is that I honestly, truly, humbly feel incredibly fortunate to have them in my life, and in my children's lives.  "It takes a village to raise a child", and if these women have anything to do with it, my little ones are over the top lucky!  Meeting friends and creating true friendships in adulthood is far more personal and meaningful than when I was little.  These girls know the real me, the person I've become, and they still choose to surround themselves by me.  That feels like the biggest compliment I could ask for.

Up until about a year ago, things in California just didn't feel quite right to me.  I couldn't picture myself here, raising babies here, enjoying it here.  But now...along with a few other reasons, I'm content.  I'm happy here.  For now. Maybe forever.

Backtrack #6: Best of Cousins

Amelia and Harlow are so cute together!  They really do seem to adore each other.  I love that they are only 15 months apart, and will only be one grade apart in school.  Most of the time they play really well together.  When they see each other they run and hug then immediately head to a room to play by themselves.  I remember growing up with my cousins.  I felt so close to them, cared about them so much, felt safe with them and never really cared for any other friends.  It's nice knowing that cousins are really just best friends that never go away, that you can never be mad at forever, and the unspoken special bond that comes with the title.  I am so excited to see these two girls grow up together.  I can only hope Bennett has a cousin to grow up with as well ;)

Backtrack #5: Phoenix!

In February Mia and I drove to Phoenix.  Yeah...I'll never do that again!  A 12 hour drive during the day doesn't suite a 2 year old very well.  We stopped in Southern California to pick up Brittanie and Rubi.  I love that Mia and Rubi are so close in age (and now Cole and Bennett are as well!)  The girls have a great time together and are soooo funny!  My Mom, Michelle, Whitney and Nathan headed to Phoenix as well.  We had a great time visiting with Marla and her family for the weekend.  I'm really looking forward to going back sometime (hopefully) soon.

Me and Mom!

Mia and Whitney 

Marla

Michelle

Nathan

Backtrack #4 Dog Walking With Papa

One of Amelia's very favorite things to do is walk (the late) Ebony and little Laisee.  Every time we go to Grandma and Papa's house she asks for the leash.  She loves to help out!  After the outdoor walking is finished...she continues to walk Laisee inside for another 20 minutes.  If Papa tries to take the dogs without her she gets very upset.  She is definitely an animal girl, which is exactly like her Mama at that age :)

A Little Swimmer

Amelia has been swimming since she was 6 months old.  She looks forward to class so much each week.  She is as confident as can be.  Which is good and scary.  She can swim on her back 60 feet across the pool.  She has just started using "big arms" when swimming on her stomach.  Coach Susi has her heart...she prays for her every night :)

Proud

When I think about the type of person that I want Amelia to become, one of the traits I hope for the most is that she will be kind. I hope she has a genuinely good heart and I hope she shares that kindness with those she crosses paths with in life.  

I love having proud Mommy moments:

• I love that she will share her toys (75% of the time).  
• I love that she usually just says "Okay Mommy" when I tell her something she doesn't want to hear.  
• I love that she will tell her friend "Please don't do that, it makes me sad". 
• I love that she will talk to the cashier at the grocery store.  
• I love that she will join a new class at church and immediately say hello to the little girl next to her.  
• I love that she will ask people "How are you doing?"  
• I love that in her nightly prayers they consist only of "thank you for (insert every possible item and person in her life)".  
• I love that when I buy her a new shirt or wash her clothes or buy her favorite food she excitedly says "Oh thank you for washing my pink leotard Mommy!!" 
• I love that when I let out a big sigh she says "Are you feeling okay Mommy?"

She is truly such a nice little girl.  I hope I can continue to say that when she's 15 years old.